With Mother’s Day approaching I hold a special place in my heart for you…
Are you familiar with the poem Maud Muller? I’ve loved this poem since I was a teenager (probably longer than you’ve been alive 🤣) Most feel the last few stanzas point to regret ~ loss and longing and for many, many years so did I. I never got past “what might have been”. Just recently I’ve come to see ~ feel the hope offered in the closing lines. I don’t believe this life on earth is the end game of our existence. I would pray you, too, could feel hope…
Kansas was and is my home. “Home, home on the range…” not so much, more like small town vibe with rolling plains nearby. Carrie may you continue to find glimmers….recently read about them: “Glimmers are small moments that make us feel a sense of calm, connection, peace, and safety. They are the little things we notice that instantly elevate our mood, even when we are feeling down or are in the midst of a bad day. Comparing glimmers and triggers is another way to understand them….Glimmer is a term coined by licensed clinical social worker Deb Dana who specializes in treating complex trauma through the lens of Polyvagal Theory. While many of the particulars of Polyvagal Theory have not been proven empirically, the general theory and other similar theories about the role of the nervous system in healing trauma are regularly used in therapeutic settings.”
Complicated relationships…yes my Momma gone age 69…nine years from me now. Wheelchair bound with MS 30 years…no more beloved career as a registered nurse. Desperately wanting my brother and I to go on and thrive when we struggled leaving her isolated and mostly alone, even though our Dad was there “sort of” you could say. He had his own way of grieving her decline and withdrawing being busy and active when she couldn’t go and do. Carrie, my heart goes out to you I’m 13 years in the club and it just sucks! Lots to process and ride those waves of grief. HUGS!
Carrie, I’ve always wondered what your mom said when giving you a choice. Choice between your soon to be husband, or, herself.
How does one do, or say this to their daughter?
My daughter and I had a strained relationship, which has led to estrangement. But,I can’t imagine things I would say, giving her a choice. My minds never went there no matter the situation back then. Back then when my daughter was getting married. Maybe I’m strange or something. But, how does one offer a choice?
If you don’t mind, I’d like hearing reasons she gave. I just can’t imagine. With such difference in a mother and a future husband. Where, how, could anyone come up with something sane sounding?
I hope I haven’t insulted you asking these things.
Thank you for always discussing things causing my mind to go places.
With Mother’s Day approaching I hold a special place in my heart for you…
Are you familiar with the poem Maud Muller? I’ve loved this poem since I was a teenager (probably longer than you’ve been alive 🤣) Most feel the last few stanzas point to regret ~ loss and longing and for many, many years so did I. I never got past “what might have been”. Just recently I’ve come to see ~ feel the hope offered in the closing lines. I don’t believe this life on earth is the end game of our existence. I would pray you, too, could feel hope…
“God pity them both! and pity us all,
Who vainly the dreams of youth recall;
For of all sad words of tongue or pen,
The saddest are these: "It might have been!"
Ah, well! for us all some sweet hope lies
Deeply buried from human eyes;
And, in the hereafter, angels may
Roll the stone from its grave away!”
Kansas was and is my home. “Home, home on the range…” not so much, more like small town vibe with rolling plains nearby. Carrie may you continue to find glimmers….recently read about them: “Glimmers are small moments that make us feel a sense of calm, connection, peace, and safety. They are the little things we notice that instantly elevate our mood, even when we are feeling down or are in the midst of a bad day. Comparing glimmers and triggers is another way to understand them….Glimmer is a term coined by licensed clinical social worker Deb Dana who specializes in treating complex trauma through the lens of Polyvagal Theory. While many of the particulars of Polyvagal Theory have not been proven empirically, the general theory and other similar theories about the role of the nervous system in healing trauma are regularly used in therapeutic settings.”
Complicated relationships…yes my Momma gone age 69…nine years from me now. Wheelchair bound with MS 30 years…no more beloved career as a registered nurse. Desperately wanting my brother and I to go on and thrive when we struggled leaving her isolated and mostly alone, even though our Dad was there “sort of” you could say. He had his own way of grieving her decline and withdrawing being busy and active when she couldn’t go and do. Carrie, my heart goes out to you I’m 13 years in the club and it just sucks! Lots to process and ride those waves of grief. HUGS!
Carrie, I’ve always wondered what your mom said when giving you a choice. Choice between your soon to be husband, or, herself.
How does one do, or say this to their daughter?
My daughter and I had a strained relationship, which has led to estrangement. But,I can’t imagine things I would say, giving her a choice. My minds never went there no matter the situation back then. Back then when my daughter was getting married. Maybe I’m strange or something. But, how does one offer a choice?
If you don’t mind, I’d like hearing reasons she gave. I just can’t imagine. With such difference in a mother and a future husband. Where, how, could anyone come up with something sane sounding?
I hope I haven’t insulted you asking these things.
Thank you for always discussing things causing my mind to go places.
I cried reading this. It touched a place deep in my soul.
I can’t describe my feelings as Carrie does.
Only to say, this touched every thread of my soul.
It’s as though I wrote it. Because I, too, lived it.
I have to leave now. I have water in my eyes. And knots in my throat.
Crying as an adult longing for what could have been. But, knowing it can’t ever be.